Warning: spoilers, spoilers, spoilers.
It’s less than a week since the first big DC Comics blockbuster hit the cinema and the social media machine hasn’t disappointed. There’s an apparent war between the uptight, dismissive critics and the relatively raving audiences. Banter has ensued in workplaces over whether the sucky elements are overcome by the genuine strengths of the film. And of course, that interview with the two main stars in which Ben Affleck remains mostly silent while some smart alec plonks an ideal piece of Simon and Garfunkel over the top. My goodness, go have a look at it before you continue.
For the record, I generally don’t like the recent run of superhero movies. Like a lot of the popular pop culture characters of the past moving into the present day, our comic characters have undergone the “dark and gritty” treatment. It’s not entirely a bad move – it worked with Christopher Nolan’s vision of Batman in the Dark Knight trilogy – but you can’t just weld other superheroes to such dull slabs of metal. It worked with Nolan’s Batman because his character background is decidedly dark itself and warrants a diversion from the days of wacky sound effects and onomatopoeia. But stick this attitude to most other superheroes, where’s the fun in that? It’s happened with a lot of the Marvel films of late. Okay, they don’t go the whole hog with the “dark and gritty” theme but there is this tendency to add a level of, ahem, realism. Sure, I like realism but if you have a hero who’s naturally a goof and quite the outgoing kind who’d happily replace your resident wacky bushwalk guide, grounding them with moody, mopey, stakes-are-high stories cancels out much of the appeal. Yes, you elicit an alternative perspective and try to possibly humanise these superheroes but after years and years of this toying, it’s a real drag. Now Marvel hasn’t taken “dark and gritty” to the max – yet – and this is evident from the occasional gag here and there in their films. As for DC…
First off, let’s make it clear that DC has it hard. Marvel’s already got their Cinematic Universe. DC Comics has turned up late to the party (so late in fact that it’s more unfashionable than phat pants) and is struggling to get their Extended Universe kickstarted. Whereas Marvel’s Iron Man gave us high hopes, DC’s Man of Steel rebooted Superman to grey fanfare. I remember seeing most of it. I don’t know how I remember it. It was bloody boring. There were some interesting turns in it but “dark and gritty” was turned up beyond eleven. I was almost convinced Henry Cavill’s personality had already been surpassed in humanity by a decade-old production line mechanical robot arm. I was also wondering why Zod picked Earth to terraform. Last I checked, there are other planets out there that probably react better to so-called “world engines” and cause less fuss with living creatures. Did I mention Man of Steel was mostly rubbish?
Imagine the horror I felt when they announced Batman v Superman. I have this observation that about 90% of films with the word “versus” or any variation in the title will be shit. Examples: Freddy vs. Jason; Alien vs. Predator (and its sequel); Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus; Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever; Dracula vs. Frankenstein; Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla (yep, there’s a sequel here too); the list just goes on. That’s not to say there aren’t any good ones. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World and Joe Versus the Volcano come to mind (although there’s many who’d say otherwise about the latter). It wasn’t just the mere mention of “versus” in a movie title that annoyed me. The notion of pitting Batman against Superman is already ridiculous from the outset. I’ve seen my fair share of people offering valid reasons using the logic from the DC films as to how a billionaire in a black suit could defeat an all-powerful alien with laser eyes and iron fists, but I think it’s clear Superman could knock out the guy from Gotham just by sneezing. All in all, in the lead-up to seeing this attempt at really selling the DC Extended Universe to the world, Batman v Superman reeked of mistakes and corporate billionaires sticking their hands in our wallets.
So I went to see the movie.
Now you will already know that the critics hate this movie. As of writing, the Rotten Tomatoes score was 28%. However, speaking with other people who’ve seen the movie, it’s surprisingly more positive, many citing the performances – although I suspect each person I asked had some kind of crush/admiration for at least one of the actors/actresses (Affleck and Gal Gadot, who plays Wonder Woman, appeared to attract the most lauding). In fact, the Rotten Tomatoes audience score reflects this unusual response for what should be a shitty flick, scoring 72% with the not-snob-nosed critical crowd. Essentially, this is a reverse Hail, Caesar! scenario (a film with great technical accomplishments but not much that was audience-friendly as I discovered in a previous review). Gee, 2016’s getting weird.
So what’s the setup with Batman v Superman? Well, we get yet another reshooting of Bruce Wayne’s origin story which I’m sure is burned into our skulls enough times. Then it moves to the events from Man of Steel’s final act. Surprisingly, I liked the setup here and honestly thought there was an interesting direction that the film took. As Superman fights Zod via the tried-and-true method of smashing the villain through hundreds of skyscrapers, Wayne flies into Metropolis to ensure the safety of his employees at a Wayne Enterprises building but arrives as the fight decimates the offices, sewing the seed of hatred from the dude in the red cape. Seriously, I liked this angle. It’s a very convincing argument for Wayne to became the Gotham vigilante in preparation to take down Superman, and he’s not the only one concerned. The rest of the world is questioning where Superman is a good idea or not, and weighing in on the matter is our obvious bad guy Lex Luthor… sorry, it’s actually Alexander Luthor (fuck that, it’s Lex now), played by Jesse Eisenberg who is still clearly high from the drugs he smoked in American Ultra. He wants a piece of kryptonite from one of Zod’s crashed spaceships as a kind of insurance when the time comes to kill the flying guy with an S on his suit. Superman himself, under his public guise of Daily Planet journalist Clark Kent, learns about the mysterious Batman terrorising Gotham and decides he’s dangerous and must be stopped. Okay, not as well-developed a tale but let’s run with that for now.
Wayne learns of LexCorp’s questionable activities but data copied from Luthor’s serversis stolen by the mysterious Diana Prince. He gets it back of course, and in one of the most befuddling sequences in the movie, Wayne suffers a… dream?…of a world that’s… uh, gone bad? And there’s a time traveller telling him stuff? No, for real, a time traveller from the future saying stuff! What is this, Doctor Who? I don’t get it. It justs pops out of nowhere. Maybe it’s to wake up the people who’ve fallen asleep in the cinema. Anyways, he gets the data and finds that Luthor’s been keeping tabs on Prince and other subjects labelled as metahumans. Prince is especially strange in that she hasn’t appeared to age since an old-timey photo of her in an Amazonian outfit (hint hint: it’s Wonder Woman). Oh, Wayne also learns about the acquisition of a piece of kryptonite and almost snatches it sneakily – ha ha, as if he does it sneakily. Nope, it’s chaos and carnage through Gotham but whoop-de-doo, Superman intervenes and… (drum roll)… lets him off. Wow! Much action! Very fight! Quite drama! It’s a false climax. The Batmobile gets wrecked.
Things don’t go well for Superman by the way. He goes to court like all good boys only for Luthor to ruin the proceedings by having a bomb blow up and kill everyone – except Superman because I suspect he’s made of steel (I’m just going off what the last film said). There’s some moping and… oh get on with it Kent! We don’t have all day to watch you be “dark and gritty”, ugh! Don’t worry though, good ol’ Luthor, for no reason except that Eisenberg is still stoned, enters the spaceship wreck in Metropolis and starts creating a… creature? I mean, there’s science involved… I take it he’s a mad scientist. Something about blending his DNA with that of Zod’s. Makes me wonder why he didn’t use a Blendtec blender. I hear those things can shred iPhones to the atomic level.
Anyway, we finally get to the “versus” mode as Luthor reveals he knows a lot about Superman – as to how, I don’t fucking know, maybe Eisenberg’s on a new CIA drug – and will have his “mother” killed unless he goes to Gotham to kill Wayne/Batman. So we at last get the epic battle… well, Batman’s all prepped to stab red cape guy with a kryptonite spear (personally, I’d rather fashion some kryptonite-tipped arrows with a bow instead; Katniss would do that for sure). Superman doesn’t really want any beef with Batman but failing to use his non-existent negotiation skills, the fight goes ahead. You’d think Superman wins easily, but while Batman gets thrown around an absolute shitload, he’s fine because he’s a billionaire with a sort-of strong metal suit this time around. Also, he gets the upper hand because he’s got kryptonite smoke bombs that actually weaken the alien with an S for a chest to collapse. But of course, no-one wants Superman to die so in comes Amy Adams as Lois Lane – I think I forgot to mention that she appears real early in the film (as usual) – and by pure coincidence, Batman’s mother’s name is the same as Superman’s “mother” so they agree to work together to stop Luthor’s… uh, plan? Yeah, this whole “versus” thing didn’t really reach a head at all, even with untold levels of “dark and gritty” that actually shorted out power to all of Brisbane.
I don’t know what Luthor wanted, but he sure as hell has no way of getting away with creating a monstrous being that feeds of the energy of the superheroes’ attacks to grow stronger and emit… uh, orange EMP lightning thingies? Yeah, that’s another unknown. Then Prince (Diana, not the short singer) finally arrives as Wonder Woman, by far the coolest entrance of any character in the entire movie. They even put in some rock to accompany her scenes. Couldn’t have asked for more there. So the three of them fight the big monster but it’s pointless. Superman finds Batman’s kryptonite spear and shoves it into the monster (I still maintain that a bow and arrow is better). The creature dies… but so does Superman (plot twist!) to my imaginary dismay. Anyone with a brain will know they wouldn’t let Superman die before they even got to the Justice League movies. So Lois Lane mopes, the folks of Metropolis mope, Luthor gets a shave, and Batman isn’t such a bad man after all. With the red-caped man in a coffin dropped into a hole in the ground, Wayne makes what should’ve been an inspirational speech but ends up being nothing. And you know that “justice” we’ve been waiting for? Well, it doesn’t even get close to dawn.
Then it ends. Oh, and obviously Superman is not dead. Duh.
I’ve gone to the trouble of going through much of the plot to point out how overstuffed the film is. That’s funny considering how bloody long it is. Director Zach Snyder could’ve easily chopped out 20 minutes of people sulking but nope, it has to be 150 minutes, for immersion reasons I suppose. I mean, I don’t mind long films but Batman v Superman’s plot didn’t justify the runtime, plus a lot of people don’t have attention spans that long. In fact, much of the failure of the film rests in the writing and story. What began with a refreshing premise that made this movie’s “dark and gritty” feel seem worth it is destroyed by nonsensical plot lines and too much content. The film tries to provide background for at least three major players (Batman, Superman and Luthor) and much of it is useless talking or lots of brooding, a typical “dark and gritty” trait. The initial framing of Superman as more of a liability to Earth provided very good reasons for the so-called fight to happen but it slowly slips away as Luthor’s plan that’s not a plan takes more of centre stage. I mean, why is he making horrible monsters from DNA splicing? Isn’t being a maniac with long hair enough? His motivations are beyond obscure and how he has knowledge of our heroes is something not even pseudo versions of Sigmund Freud’s theories could explain. Also, the actual “versus” thing… it’s not that big a deal. The real battle is against the weird creature thing with Wonder Woman tagging along. That film title alone, Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, has almost nothing to do with the movie. It’s just marketing. This has to be one of very few big name films to have a title that hardly correlates to its content. It’s an absolute scam and almost as misleading as those trailers for Hail, Caesar! And where’s the damn justice? What justice is there to be made? Justice against Luthor? Justice against holding grudges? Justice against having “dark and gritty” superhero movies? And another thing, it’s too “dark and gritty”. The whole mood works with Batman but when I think of Superman, I think of a man swooping a cat out of a tree, cape fluttering in the wind with a smug face. There’s very little humour here, it’s all taken way too seriously. That’s not good for this film in particular. If it’s just a Batman flick, sure, go crazy with all the “dark and gritty” stuff. Don’t drag Superman any further into it, he only needed half of that “dark and gritty” from Man of Steel.
While the story is a major weakness, I was surprised at what actually worked in Batman v Superman apart from a wicked setup. Cavill’s Superman has stepped up from the dready Man of Steel; not a big step up, but a move from the emotionless flying tile in the previous film. I know Cavill can act because he did it in the film version of The Man from U.N.C.L.E. and thankfully he was a little more likeable in this movie. Affleck as Batman… whoa, I expected worse. He’s very invested in it, and very much nails Wayne’s character. He’s slightly darker and more violent than Christian Bale’s Batman in the Dark Knight series and I welcome that. Is he better than Bale? That’s open to debate so I won’t dwell on that point. Diana Prince/Wonder Woman’s story is decidedly more sparse to maintain a level of mystery to her but despite this lack of info, her tale was more compelling simply because we don’t know much. Also, rock music when she joins the fight. Rock on! Her performance was fine, I don’t really have any complaints. Sure, the outfit isn’t that patriotic red-white-and-blue America bullshit but a more metallic and battle-hardened one more appropriate for a presumed Amazonian. The fight scene against that creature in the final act was the most exciting out of all the other ones. The CGI shines best in this fight too. Sure, it’s what I expect in terms of quality – c’mon, Avatar is like six or seven years old now, big budget effects should’ve upped their game – but more impressive is the scale and incorporation into live action shots that make it more believable. And before I forget, Eisenberg as Luthor. Yes, I’ve taken a lot of shots at his stupid plan for… world domination? I don’t know. Regardless, Eisenberg was a good choice for the role, even if he acted more like the Joker than a scheming madman. His jumpy, off-kilter mannerisms probably made Luthor a more interesting character although I don’t claim to have read the comics so I’m not going to comment on parallels with the actual comic book interpretations.
The bizarre thing about Batman v Superman is that it gets a lot wrong while the rest of the elements are done unusually well. The story, despite initial promise, faltered and simply made less and less sense as the overly-long film continued. However, the good performances of the main actors was a shock, and so were the special effects. Snyder is a man who has quite an obsession with over-the-top CGI. In other films of his, he’s created visual eye candy to die for but justification for it dies with every other aspect sucking a lot of balls. However, he pulls it off here because there are other elements that are done well, primarily in acting. It coupled well with the cinematography and honestly was quite a spectacle eventually. Now the critics agree that this film is rubbish but then again, these people said Hail, Caesar! was a masterpiece. Sure, it was made well but it was a bit of a let down. With Batman v Superman, I suppose they just wanted to hammer it (like me initially) and focussed more on the story elements. However, the sheer amount of visuals and strong performances of iconic characters is enough for audiences to watch. So, is Batman v Superman a shit film? I say no. Is it a great film? Nope. It’s a hit-and-miss affair and opinion will be based upon whether you’re a story buff or a visual buff. I’m open to both sides and as much as I was angry at the ridiculous leaps in logic, I have to admit that, for a film I expected to hate, I enjoyed it a little. It was the acting that sold me. It’s a better film than Man of Steel although if this DC Extended Universe is to continue, the studios need to put their brains back into their craniums and have a serious think about where they go from here. The problem so far has been story and too much “dark and gritty” seriousness. Hopefully some of this will be rectified in later DC films like Suicide Squad. For now though, we have the disappointing Man of Steel and this giant “versus” movie that hasn’t got a lot of “versus” any way you look at it. Should you watch it? Yeah, give it a chance. It’s no wonder, but I feel there’s just enough good to overcome the bad. On that note, I award Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice a score of:
5.5/10
Had the story been thought out better and had the film been given a diet better than the paleo one, the acting and effects would have happily supplemented the film to greater success. However, this is what we have to work with, and honestly it’s not as bad as what some are saying.
Matters of Opinion 